Stay, oh Heart of My Soul Part One

Why must the most enduring, loving lesson not taught

Be that which absorbs the whole me; the whole of my life

Long Suffering Love

It cannot be learned but it can be decided; felt; wrenched out

It cannot be spoken but seen; known; understood; but yet in doubt

Long Suffering Patience

It doesn’t break; you cannot tell me how to get there; I must arise

I’ve been told what to do; told how to do it; then hated for fighting back

Long Hearing Accusation

One moment I hate myself but then allow release to take it away

He forgives the unexplained, silent pain you decided but see not

Long Awaited Release

To see long suffering abate is not a lesson; it’s not quite a dwelling

But it is also not a gypsy me; it is something I call stay, my soul

Willing Meaningless Me

In my world, you must do to be; you must reach to remain; you cannot rest

There is always something to prove; to push for; and if you don’t, you aren’t

Negative Life Existence

I have decided to be meaningless; yet here doing my part; silently screaming

Why? I never knew, but was only known–and that’s never good enough

They Still Lead

And if they still lead, it isn’t suffering anything–they tell me what to do to fix it

Don’t do it, fail again and yet, I have learned to do it is to never be right enough

Long Living Failure

There is no way out like there was no way in; I awoke to realities beautifully

Beautifully wrong yet right so I keep testifying then hitting delete in hopes

Failure is OK

But I explained tonight, and I think it was a little bit understood this time

How I found my true self under all the straight jackets of Christian religion

What a Gift

And he agreed that I shouldn’t deny that part they did deny and do not want

Just throw that part away, Cara, and be done with your stupidity–live this way

To Be Right

I’d rather have a failed love feast where I am who I am and keep up with chores

Than a self-satisfied existence where I feel like I am worth something I’m not

Until Truth Stays

Windows of the Soul by Ken Gire Part Two

 

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